==========

Continuing.....

==========

Aatish..." I didn't had words on his effeminacy and dastardliness. How can a father said to abort his own child...

That wasn't an Illegitimate child, but Aatish was treating that child like an unpardonable sin of us.

"Will you again divorce me after birth of this child?" I asked and he stay quite for a minute or two then closed his eyes for a while and nodded.

"We can't live a life which we were living" He said in whispered and was shocked

"Coward man, you are saying to abort your child and divorce your wife just because you want to live a better life. But what about my life and this child's life? What will happen with us? And will live happily without me and your child?" I shouted on him and he made himself stand.

"Talk to me where are you going?" I said angrily and moved towards him, he was going towards the stairs.

"Where are you going?" I held his wrist when he stepped down from the stairs. "I am going to my room" I said while taking another step and I also stepped down with him.

"This is your room..." I said and he freed his hand.

"No this is your room. Stay here without any problem, you will get whatever you want, just tell me what you need and I'll bring that to you but I'm telling to clearly that I'll divorce you after the birth of this child. And remember one thing I'm saying to abort this child but if you will not be agree then you have to raise this child by yourself, I'll not take his any responsibility.

I went down following him, holding his hand in mine....

"Aatish how you do this with your own blood and flesh, this is your own child... How will he face every situation without father. Why are you thinking to divorce me. I'll live in any condition with you. No matter if you will be able to find out a job or not... I'll manage in any condition and..." I saying but he jeked my hand.

"What's the matter with you? Can't you understand? I can't live a life which I was living with you. I was dying to find out a single job for day... Maryam try to understand... Leave me... Live your life and let me live mine" He shouted on me and his family members come out from their respective rooms after listening that voice.

"Yeh kya tamasha laga rakha hai subah subah? Ho kya raha hai?" Aatish's father roared and I jumped on my place due to that loud voice.

(What is going on here? Why are you doing this drama early in the morning?)

"Ammi, Baba I'm also a girl just like your daughter. How will you feel if your son-in-law behave like this with your daughter. Why are you not stopping Aatish to do this with me?" I questioned in pleading way.

"Don't compare yourself with our daughter, she is not you who run away from her home." Aatish's mother said and I looked at her suddenly then turned to saw Aatish.

"I didn't ran away from home. Your son come to do Marriage. And if I ran away then I ran with your son so how he is pure and I'm only culprit?" I asked to his mother and Aatish held my arm from behind.

"Go upstairs, you don't have to come downstairs. You will get everything you need in the room" He pushed me towards the stairs, I lost my balance and fell down.

"Aatish what are you doing? Don't you know about her..." Aatish's brother said with disappointed voice and bhabhi made me stand up.

"Bhai, bhabhi Aatish is saying that he will divorce me'' I said while crying

"Bhai please you say something to him... Where will I go? What will you do if your sister or daughter face any thing like this?" I asked and bhai looked at his wife and his two years old daughter who was in his arms.

"Aatish what do you want to do? This is your stubbornness to marry with Maryam and what happened now?" He asked to Aatish with disappointment

''Bhai I'm tired of this life... I can't live like this, begging for every single penny" Aatish said and bhai looked at his parents

"Ammi, baba you say something, sort out this matter. Put your egos aside. Now it's not about only Aatish and Maryam" bhai said to his parents and they both glared him.

"What are we doing? They both are not small kids they will do what they found suitable for their life" Aatish's mother said and I looked at Aatish who was standing silently.

"Aatish do you want to live with Maryam?" Bhai asked to Aatish and he think for a moment and shook his head

"I'm tired of that life" Aatish said with frustration.

"If you don't face any problem, if you do work in business with us, will you then live with Maryam?" Bhai asked and this time Aatish looked at me and he slowly nodded, and I smiled on his answer

"Baba why are you not accepting Maryam? She didn't come here by herself. Aatish did Marriage with her, let her go work in business and he will happily live his life with his family" Bhai said and I nodded looking at Aatish and his parents.

"Why you are so much concerned about this girl?? If you want to expels yourself from business and home then talk about this matter otherwise stay quite and live your life in the way in which you are living" Aatish's father said to his elder brother and I was shocked on that..

"Please don't say anything, where will we go with our children?" bhabhi said to bhai in mumbling voice after holding his arm and I was feeling helpless.

I wanted to talk to Aatish but he didn't even glanced at me and entered in a room, maybe his room...

"Ammi... Baba... I'll live my whole life like a maid in your home. I'll do every work of your home but please... Please stop Aatish to do something like this" I literally begged in front of them but it seems they had a store in their chest on the place of their heart.

I looked at Bhai and bhabhi, and join my palms in front of them but they both stay quite and soon bhai went inside his room and bhabhi also did the same.

His parents also left me alone and sat down on stairs, resting my head with staircase. I was feeling broken, instead of feeding sweets to others, Aatish and his parents were unaffected by the news.

I was sitting on the first stair in the same position for more six hours everyone was busy in their works and I was feeling like a non existing lifeless frame.

Running my gaze here there I found only Aatish's mother sitting on the chair of dining table. Bhabhi was out of the home to pick her son from the school and all the male members were on their works

"Ammi... Aatish is saying to do abortion" I said thinking that she must react on that but I was expecting softness from rock.

"So what can I do?" She said while biting a slice of fruit.

"Ammi this is the child of your son." I pleaded and got a glare from her

"We are tolerating your face in this home just because of this child, otherwise I don't wanna see your face. But only seven months then you get lost from here with your child"

This time I didn't said anything and moved towards the room...

Many days passed in the same say and I was crying and begging in front of those heartless people but no benefits...

After almost Three months

I was very ill and hungry too. That was mid night, I tried to cook something for myself but couldn't. So I made my way to downstairs and went to Aatish's room. He was sleeping peacefully and I was crying due to earache.

"Aatish.. Aatish" I shook his arm and he woke up.

"Aatish please take me to doctor I can't tolerate this pain anymore" I said while pressing my right ear with palm and he keep looking me for a couple of moments and then nodded.

______________

''Ros... Maryam we reached" He said when we came to home from hospital and I came out of my world of thoughts. I was sitting on bike behind him holding him very tightly, resting my head on his back and continously crying, when I removed my head his shirt was wet with my tears.

I went towards my room and looked at Aatish who entered in his room. I silently stepped up stairs and lay down to sleep because I doctor gave me injection of painkiller, and I was sleepy. After some five minutes I heard the sound of door opening of my room and found Aarish entering in.

"You forget this medicine" He said and passed my remaining medicines.

"Now sleep" He said giving me medicine and I held his wrist.

"Don't go, stay with me just for sometime. Go back to your room when I fell asleep" I said and he freed his hand but in very next moment he sat down beside me. I held his arm and tried to sleep. After some five minutes I was consumed by slumber.

When I woke up next morning didn't found Aatish beside me...

I was the same girl who was so much stubborn and egoistic but since three months I was pleading in front of Aatish and his parents regularly. Aatish was saying me to be ready for abortion but I didn't get agreed in the return of my stubbornness he left me on the 2nd floor like an useless article of home. No one come to know about me except bhabhi. Sometimes a servant come to give me food and my medicines other than that I was isolated by them. In those days I just write my diary and thought to go back to Abbu's home but I didn't had guts to go back their. Time was passing and I was

When I entered in eighth month I was very weak, sometimes it was impossible for me to open my eyes. I was just laying down on bed for two days but no come to ask me if I was dead or alive. I gathered my courage, packed my clothes and went downstairs. Aatish's parents were sitting on breakfast table with their elder son and Aatish must be in his room. Without paying attention to anyone I stepped towards Aatish's room, I was walking with the support of wall.

"Where... Where are you going?" Aatish's mother asked when I stepped closer to Aatish's room

"Zehraaa come here... Zehra help her" Bhai shouted to call bhabhi but before she came to me I entered in the room where Aatish was standing in front of mirror buttoning his shirt.

"Aatish..." I said going towards him and before I fell down he catched me.

"What happened?" He asked while sitting on the floor to maintain his balance, and resting my head on his chest.

"I.. I did the biggest mistake of my life by marrying you." I muttered and he looked at me,

"What is her new drama?" Aatish's mother entered in the room and yelled loudly.

"Ammi at least look at her condition" I listened someone's voice.

"Maryam... Rose.. Open your eyes" I listened Aatish's voice and felt his hands patting my cheek and then I don't know what was going around me.

I felt droplets of water on my face and I opened my eyes. Aatish was sitting beside me and bhabhi and bhabhi was standing at the distance of two steps

"Are you alright?" Bhabi asked me and I looked at Aatish.

"Aatish... Please... Think for one more time" I mumbled and he looked away.

"Aatish you are doing wrong, she is your wife. Think about your family" Bhai said and he ignored.

"Aatish, Drop me to my home" I said in hushed tone, I didn't had energy to say anything else.

"Aatish you will be answerable in front of Allah for what you are doing with your wife and child" Saying that bhai left the room and I was alone with Aatish

"Aatish I'll regret for loving you and trusting you" I mumbled and a tear rolled down from the corner of my eye.

"I'm bringing your stuff" He said before going out if the room.

"Ammi, Baba don't be so heartless. Stop her...." I listened bhai's voice from outside the room. I made my way towards the door with great difficulty at the same time Aatish came downstairs holding my bag in one hand and extended other hand for me to held.

"Puri zindagi ke liye akela chhod rahe ho to kuch der ke liye hath pakadne ka kya fayda!" I mumbled with tear filled eyes and he held me by shoulder to support me. I wasn't in condition to walk so I didn't refused, but I was watching him. He was the same man who took me to his home as his wife and then he was going to go drop me back to my home.

(When you have decided to left me alone then what's the point of holding hand for sometime.)

"Ammi I'm going to drop her to her home" Aatish informed while slipping his arm around my shoulder blades and I literally left my weight on him

"Aatish She Won't come back again. Right?" his mother asked and I wiped my tears.

"Ammi... She you are also a lady, at least you can think about her condition" bhabi said with tear filled eyes and a sob left from my mouth

"Aatish please..."

"Ammi... Baba..., think about if you give him share in business he won't divorce me... Please." I pleased last time in the front of those heartless people and lifted tiny steps towards the door holding Aatish's shirt with one hand and my belly with other hand.

I wasn't in the condition of sitting on bike so Aatish decided to took me in auto rickshaw. I was sitting resting my head to one corner and he was sitting on other side in auto rickshaw.

"Aatish" I mumbled and he looks at me

"Hmm?"

"I'll do prayer if it's a boy then he don't be like his father, coward, unmanly and effeminate. And if it's a girl then her destiny don't be like her mother" I said in almost no voice but he listened everything and his gaze showed me that he was unaffected. We went to home and Aatish drop me to the door of home.

My condition was very critical, so instead of making me rest in home Ammi and Abbu took me to hospital and doctors immediately hospitalised me. I stay in hospital for five days but Aatish didn't came to meet me.

==============

I was better than before and Ammi Abbu were not ignoring me anymore because they were concerned about me and my health. Maham was talking to me regularly which was diverting my mind in positive way. Two months passed away in a blink of eyes and one day when I was sleeping....

"Ammi..."

"Ammiiii" I shouted with pain and Ammi come in the room

"Maryam"

===============

{Author's Note: I didn't had any ideas to write the next scene, bcoz I wasn't able to feel that emotion so For the first time I took help from my mumma to write a story. She always says that I had brown eyes and red lips (at the time of birth) so today I said her to write all those things on a paper and she did so. I just edit that by changing some words, adding some grammatic touches, and put only a artificial line. Other then that shifa's face is discribed by my mummy. My writing talent come from her, she use to write very good articles and speeches for us when we were in school. ❤️}

"Its a baby girl" I listened a voice in half sleepy situation and I sleep.

And I woke up with a small crying voice. And Ammi handed over a small doll like baby to me. A smile made its way to my lips after witnessing a pair of light brown eyes with curly lashed. A tiny nose just above the pair if red lips, so much red that they were looking highlighted on snowy white completion of my doll. Her cheeks were neither chubby nor thin but as soft as feather with a brown small mole on left cheek. When I kissed her small forehead she immediately stopped crying and blinked her eyes which made my smile bigger and Ammi also smiled on the scene. I again kissed her cheek and she opened her small mouth. Wrapped in a sky blue towel my baby was looking like a real doll. Her very small hair were coming to her forehead and her eyebrows were nowhere. I adjusted her in my left forearm and held her closer to my chest. I was keep watching my baby and caressing her cheek and chin with my first finger. My daughter was the first and most beautiful gift which I got from this marriage.

"Ammi, Masha Allah she is very beautiful" I mumbled without averting my eyes from her face. I touched her hand which was closed in a tight fist and she held my finger. I was busy in examining my doll's beauty when Ammi's voice dragged me out from the world of fantasy to the real world.

"Your Abbu informed Aatish and his parents about the baby" Ammi said and I looked up.

"It's been three hours when he call in his home" Ammi added in hushed tone.

"And Aatish haven't come?" I asked and Ammi shook her head and I closed my eyes hugging my daughter securely and plantes a kiss on her cheek.

"Ya Allah please don't make my daughter's destiny like her mother" I asked to my almighty in my heart. After some half an hour abbu entered in the hospital room, with a knock, and he didn't glanced at me. He was angry with me. But he took the baby in his arms with a big smile and kissed her forehead but a tear dropped from his eyes. In my whole life I witnessed him crying first time. He never cried for me even in worst condition but his eyes dropped a lone tear for my daughter whose father didn't came to even glanced at her.

=============

After some four days I was in my room, changing my baby's clothes. Usually Ammi use to do all those works but, since last night Maham had very high fever and Ammi was busy with her. Aatish still didn't came

I wasn't in condition to walk but I decided to give a last chance to my destiny and moreover my daughter's destiny.

"Ammi..."

"Do you need something?"

"Ammi I'm going to Aatish's home" I said meakly and she glared me.

"As you wish, have you ever listened our command!! Go ahead" Ammi didn't wants to send me but I was determined to go there.

Holding my baby in my arms I stepped in Aatish's home. Everyone was present in the dining area and bhabhi was serving lunch.

"Aatish" I pronounced his name and every gaze traveller towards me.

"Aatish see... Our daughter" I said going towards him with tiny steps and he was silently looking at me.

"How you dare to come inside my home" I jumped on my place on the roaring manly voice but I didn't stopped and went to Aatish who was sitting beside his brother.

"Aatish see how beautiful she is." I said but he didn't glanced at our baby, his gaze was fixed on my face.

"Ammi you see, she is daughter of your son." I extended my baby towards her but she didn't held her But Bhai took her and smiled..

"Aatish see her mole is just like you" this time Aatish looked at his daughter and a smile creep to his lips, I also smiled when he took her in his arms, but baby suddenly started crying and I took back her.

"What name you have give to her?" Bhai asked when I was rocking her to made her off cry.

"Ammi Abbu is saying Shifa but I like Bushra" I stated and Bhai nodded

"Both names are good"

"Get out from my house." I listened his father's voice and looked at Aatish... Who was sitting on chair watching me when I was struggling to make my baby off cry.

"Aatish we can start a beautiful life together, look at her she is so cute" I said to him ignoring his father's words.

"Aatish divorce her at the same time." His father said and I looked at him.

"No... Aatish please no... She is a girl... How will she face the world. How will she answer when everyone ask her about her father" I pleaded in front of him and he looked at his parents.

"Ammi she is Aatish's daughter, stop all these things and accept Maryam." bhai said in angry mood.

"If you wanna support her then you can go from my home." His father threatened him and I wiped my tears

"Baba if your daughter face problem how will you feel. Just think about me like your own daughter" I begged in front of those heartless people.

"I.. I give you divorce" Aatish's words gave me the feeling like someone push down me from sky and I was waiting to fell on the land.

"Aatish don't be fool, he is your wife, your responsibility, you can't divorce her for the sake of a comfortable life. Think about your daughter" Bhai shouted on him but i was continuously watching him without blinking.

"Ammi you stop him, baba you are going wrong" Bhai said to his parents.

"I give you divorce" Aatish again said and I held my baby closer to my chest wrapped in my both arms.

"Aatish stop it...." Bhai shouted on him

"Bhai I can't live that life" Aatish shouted back.

"So do some efforts to earn more" Bhai replied angrily.

"You stay quite, this is the matter of Aatish you don't poke your nose in that" Aatish's mother yelled on his elder son because he was speaking from my side.

"Zehraaa... Pack your stuff" Bhai said very loudly while standing up from dining table with a jolt and everyone looked at him with shocked expressions.

"Why?" bhabhi asked with wide eyes

"Neither I want share in that business which is reason for a divorce nor I want to live in a home in which people like them live" Bhai shouted and Bhabi gasped

"What are you saying? Where will we go? We have kids.." Bhai said to bhai and he glared her.

"Tomorrow they will say me to divorce you for this comfortable life, then shall I accept their demand just for my comfort? If yes then you live here... And if no then come with me, feeding you and kids is my responsibility. I'll not let face any problem" Bhai said to bhabi angrily and I looked at Aatish.

"This is called a man" I said in hushed tone and Aatish saw his brother again.

"Josh me hosh mat khoo... Dekh lo ye bhi bohot seena chooda karke gya tha ghar se, aaya na wapas hath jodta hua" His father said to his elder son but he was insulting Aatish.

(Dont loose you patience in aggravation... See Aatish also left everything in aggravation but then what happen? He come back her after putting his ego aside)

"Insha Allah I'll not come back like him. Zehra haven't you listened what I have said... Pack our stuff." Bhai said to his parents in slow voice but said the last part to his wife loudly and she moved towards the room.

"Yeh Ladki to manhus thi hi iski beti bhi manhus hai, maa ke aate hi mera ek beta ghar se chala gaya tha aur beti ke aate hi mera dusra beta bhi ja raha hai" then I was done with Aatish's mother... I was listening everything about me but I couldn't listen anything about my daughter.

(They both mother daughter duo are jinx. When mother entered in our life she took away my younger son and now when daughter entered in this home my elder son is going away from us)

"Now its enough... I was listening everything about myself but not about my daughter, she is not a jinx but your son is a jinx who is not accepting the blessings of Allah which he send in the form of a daughter." I said angrily and looked at my daughter who was sleeping by then.

"Allah will never forgive you all for what you are doing" I said with determination but unwillingly tears popped out fron my eyes.

"I give you divorce" Aatish said and I nodded

"Thank you for this life... I will never forget you nor forgive you... But I'm happy that it's not a boy otherwise I'll be tensed for whole life that what will happen if he will be like his father. Coward, unmanly and without his backbone" I said to Aatish while wiping tears and kissed my baby's forehead.

"Zehra finish packing soon, I'm coming back in sometime" saying that bhai stepped out from the home and I also made my way to the door

"I'll send you divorce papers legally" I listened Aatish's voice for last time and went out from the home.

==============

{Iddat is the period of 4 months and 10 days for a woman after the death of her husband or after a divorce, during which she can not marry another man}

I was in the last week of iddat when we received a proposal from a man whose wife passed away one month ago in a car accident. No one was agree to marry a divorcy lady with a daughter, but that man was agree to accept me with my daughter. Abbu asked me once about the proposal and I didn't had guts to refuse so I left the decision on them. 

"His name is Anwar, and he has a five years old son. He is ready to accept Shifa too" Ammi informed me and I nodded with tear filled eyes and kissed the cheek of my daughter. Before that I got a proposal from a divorcy man who putted a condition that I had to leave my daughter with my parents to marry him, and I refused to do so. I can't leave my daughter she is my half life.

After some ten days when my iddiat period got over two ladies come to meet me and the nikkah dates were fixed for after two weeks.

I was feeling helpless, abbu and Ammi were crying for me and my destiny. They both were still offered with me, they just talk to me for asking for feed or something else. But all of them treating Shifa like a glass doll. Mostly Maham and Razi. They both got a toy with whom they use to play for whole day. Specifically Maham she was only 11 and she was treating Shifa like a doll.

"Aapi" I listened a knock on the door of my room and Razi come in.

"Shifaaaa... Come to your mama" He picked up her from bed and I smiled.

"I think you love her more than her mother" I said while folding shifa's clothes and Razi glared me, I wasn't expecting that reaction from him. He was not talking to me from the day when I marry Aatish but he never behave rude with me before.

"Her mother destroy her life with her own hands and now this little innocent girl is suffering due to you" He was the first member of our family who spit out the bitter reality on my face.

"Razi I'm sorry... I'm regretting for my wrong decision. I didn't think about Abbu's reputation..." He didn't let me complete

"Hell with reputation... People will forget about this reputation and all but Aapi you have destroyed your life. That man with whom you are going to get married is 12 years older than you. You are only 19 and he is 31, he has a son already. Now you have to raise someone's son to get the father for your daughter, this girl is facing all these things just because of you." Razi shouted on me and left the room holding Shifa in his arms.

I was standing like a dummy holding shifa's small clothes in my hands and tears in my eyes. Razi didn't said a single wrong word.... My daughter was facing problems due to me.

After some two hours I stepped out from my room. That was evening, Abbu was back from his work. He was sitting on sofa and Shifa was laying in his lap, he was playing with her granddaughter happily. Maham and Razi was sitting in his either sides smiling looking at Shifa. Going towards Abbu I sat down on floor resting my head on his knee and cried out with hiccups for about ten minutes then I felt his hand on my head he slowly pushed my head away from his knee and I looked up.

"I never expected anything like this for you. I wanted to treat you like princess but you chose this life for yourself" Abbu's voice was hushed but working was a dagger on my heart.

"Abbu forgive me... I'm regretting for my decision" I said in hushed tone.

"I'll not forgive ever. But I only pray to Allah that you don't regret for the decision which we are taking for you." saying that Abbu kissed forehead my daughter and left from there after handling over Shifa to me.

==============