Wiping the tears she looked straight in the mirror. Today she needed to decide whether he was worth to flow these tears or not?

Does she love him more than her self-respect? She asked herself while seeing the mobile screen which was showing his number, just this question was stopping her from dialing it.

No Shifa, not anymore! What's the point of making efforts in a relationship where you're all alone? You're not a replacement! You have an identity, you're not dependent on him! You can't beg for his love of he doesn't care about you! You can't be weak! Telling the on the other side of the mirror she took a deep breath!

"Mr Daniyal Kazmi, today, Shifa Anwar is closing your chapter from her life. I can't ruin my life if you don't know my value!" She told herself with determination and took a deep breath. Washing her face she smiled, it wasn't easy but this girl knew how to do difficult tasks.

"Mumma, today I'll make dinner, you just take rest. Enough of my laziness." Folding her sleeves to half Shifa walked into her parents room, Maryam was chopping vegetables sitting on the couch and Anwar was lying down on the bed. They both looked at each other and Maryam smiled sadly while opening her one arm. Shifa silently sat down beside her and rested her head on Maryam's chest.

"I'll do everything, you take rest." Maryam kissed Shifa's cheek and patted her head. "Hmm, and tell me what do you want to have in lunch tomorrow? I'll bring everything required for that." Anwar added and Shifa gave a sad look to both of them.

"Papa mummy, please! I don't need your sympathy. Please let me live strongly! I need your support not sympathy." Anwar stayed silent but Maryam cried silently and left the room.

"Papa." She walked towards the bed and sat down in front of Anwar who nodded without uttering a word. "Can I trust you?" She asked and Anwar kept seeing her for next few moments then shook his head. "Don't trust me," he sighed. "Just trust your decisions."

"Do you trust me and my decisions?" Shifa asked and Anwar one more time kept watching her for a long time then smiled like a question.

"Tumhe kya lagta hai Shifa?" He asked and Shifa shrugged, for the first time she was talking to Anwar, however, not making eye contact due to fear and hesitation.

(What do you feel, Shifa?)

"Umm... pta nhi lekin... Mujhe lagta hai aap mujh par bharosa nhi karte."

(I don't know but I feel that you don't trust me.)

"Tumhe aesa kyu lagta hai?"

(Why do you think so?)

"You never let me go for outings from college or school, you never let me live freely, you have been controlling my every action... Isn't it enough to support my opinion?" Anwar sighed while sitting up on the bed and switch off the TV which was showing a news debate till now.

"Tum par bharosa tha isi liye mene tumhe co-ed school aur college mein parhaya. Ye jaante huye bhi ki tum mujhse jhut bol kar Radio mein kaam kar rahi ho, mene tumhe kabhi nhi rooka. College farewell party mein jo kuch hua tumne mujhe aaj tak nhi bataya, tum behosh thi, Daniyal ne tumhe Maham ke ghar pohchaya, baad mein usne principal se kaha ki wo tumhara fiance hai, lekin mene tumhe college jaane se nhi rooka." Shifa was looking at Anwar in disbelief, he knew about the farewell party? How? Then she remembered that Anwar was angry with his friend who is assistant professor in Shifa's college, and today she understood the reason. Before she comes out of this shock Anwar continues... "Aur sabse badi baat... Ye jaante huye bhi ki tumhare aur Faraz ke dil mein kya tha, main sukun ki neend soota tha kyuki mujhe tum par bharosa tha ki tum koi galat qadam nhi uthaogi... Aur kitna bharosa karu main tum pr?" Shifa's breath stuck in her chest, she literally forgot to take the next breath, Anwar knew about her crush on Faraz?

(You've been studying in a co-ed system because I trusted you. Even after knowing that you're lying about your tuition and working in a radio, I didn't stop you. You never let me know whatever happened in the college farewell party, Daniyal dropped an unconscious you to Maham's place, later on he introduced himself to the principal as your fiance but I didn't stop you to go college.)

(Above all, even after knowing what you and Faraz are holding in your hearts I hadn't been restless because I had believed that you won't take any wrong step, what more could I do to trust you?)

"Wh... What? Fa... Faraz? Pa..." She was gathering some courage to deny but Anwar gave a cold look. "I don't want to bring up that topic, but the thing is, I trusted you every time." cat got her tongue, she didn't lift her eyes for the next few minutes, there was no ounce of courage left with her to say something yet her meal voice manager to come out.

"In the farewell party I was feeling dizzy and unwell so I was supposed to call you but since I wasn't able to see any clearly I dialled Deni's number by mistake, and I'm glad that he came on right time. He introduced himself as my fiance to put those fingers down who could point me out characterless for having a boyfriend. And..." Shifa took a pause, she was still unable to lift her gaze in front of her father. "And if it comes to Faraz, there was nothing in between us, I never talked to him, I never did anything which could disrespect you." Shifa's voice was low but full of confidence because she was not guilty, she wasn't even lying.

"I know, that's why I'm saying that I have been trusting you!" Shifa took a deep breath, Anwar for sure didn't know whole story about Faraz's DP and all, yet it's more than enough for Shifa to know that her father trusted her.

"If you trust me so much then why were you so strict towards me? You hold a different rulebook for me, would you do the same if I were your own blood and flesh?"

"Perhaps!" Anwar shrugged. "I trust you Shifa, but I don't trust others! And you're such an emotional fool girl. Since childhood you're so dumb, you believe on whatever you listen to. You trust everyone, you don't have your own opinion, you don't know how to take a stand for yourself... I was afraid and I still am afraid for you. You can make any dumb decision at any time without thinking twice. I was strict towards you because you could become anyone's prey after trusting him blindly." Anwar's eyes showed a moderate amount of anger but Shifa shook her head.

"You're wrong papa, I am not a fool. I don't trust people easily, that's why I don't even have friends."

"You don't have friends because you don't have confidence to put your opinion, you don't have friends because you don't like to talk to new people and you live in your own circle but if you start to trust a person you become blind, I was afraid that you could start to trust a wrong person," Anwar was clearing his intentions for the first time and Shifa was seeing the other side of the coin. Till now, there was a dark side of Anwar but today she got to know that it could be the brighter side of him if he was not so secretive towards his thoughts and opinions.

"You could talk to me regarding all these things, you could politely correct my ways but you made me feel homesick in this home." Shifa's eyes filled with tears and Anwar again kept watching her for next few minutes then only lifted his hand and caressed Shifa's head.

"I just wanted to save you from problems. I never thought of doing anything wrong with you. Maybe I don't know how to be a good father, Hamdan also has a complaint that I never give him space to share his personal matters... Maybe I was outdated in the world of modern-day parenting but I have given my best to three of you."

"You could be the best father and you still can, of you start smiling instead of showing your anger." Shifa muttered with a fearful heart, she was prepared to get another scolding from Anwar but he gave a small smile in reply. "Why you need me to trust you? Should we back to the topic?" He asked and Shifa nodded

"Actually papa..." A pause and Anwar noticed her eyes, tears gathered in those brown eyes then disappeared. "I have decided to be separated from De-n...Daniyal." she stopped herself to call him Deni and Anwar sighed, he removed his specs and clean the glasses before wearing them back.

"Are you sure?"

"Yes I'm!" Shifa said with determination and Anwar smiled like a taunt. "Already told you na that you take decisions emotionally not wisely. You make decisions then think about them." Shifa blinked blankly. Was Anwar correct?

Was she really an emotional fool? Umm... Maybe yes!

Does she trust people easily? Umm... No, she doesn't but if she once trusts a person then no room for doubts left.

Was she under-confident? Hell Yes! She feel scared to put her opinion in front of others as she feared, what would people think?

Does she take quick decisions and think about them later? Well, yes! She did the same while leaving Qasr-e-Kazmi, and later on she was questioning herself if she did correct or not?

"I'm a hundred per cent sure that if Daniyal comes right now you'll go back with him, you are taking the decision of divorce in a hurry."

"But, I'm sure this time. He won't come." She shifted her eyes down as she knew Anwar was reading the emotions present in them.

"Okay! Do whatever you want, but for now focus on your health and start going to college." She nodded and walked towards her room but came back again.

"But after completing my degree I won't do a job." she declared and Anwar sighed. Was it another quick discussion?

"Fine, no need to do a job," he said in his same rough tone, he did not want to debate about this matter right now but Shifa disappointed him. "I'll do a business, I can't take orders anymore!" Anwar blinked at the girl who was not looking broken from anywhere. He narrowed his eyes while thinking something. Was it another quick discussion? Seems Not, but who knows better than time...

=================

Qasr-e-Kazmi

"Daniyal ye sab kuch kab tak chalega? Ye tamasha band karne ka irada hai ya nhi?" Mrs Kazmi stepped into Daniyal's bedroom with a loud roar and he lifted his head from the pillow. His bloodshot eyes met with his mother and he again hid his face in the same pillow.

(Daniyal how long will this drama take to over?)

"Daniyal." Mrs Kazmi didn't know how to deal with this situation, she had never been harsh to her son and now she was unable to handle him. For the last twenty days Mr Kazmi was not talking to Daniyal, Talking was a far away thing he was not even seeing his face.

"Agar itni yaad aa rahi hai to wapas le aaiye na Shifa ko,"

(If you're missing her too much then bring her back.)

"She won't come back,"

"Shifa ko main samjha dungi, aap chaliye to..." She slowly caressed her son's head and he closed his eyes.

(I'll talk to Shifa but at least you come to take her back)

"Ammi, please leave me alone."

"Aapne ek galti kar di thi ab Shifa ko wapas na laa kar aap dusri galti karenge." Saying that Mrs Kazmi left him alone in the room and he just felt the empty side of the bed.

(You have already made a mistake now you're making another mistake by not bringing her back.)

"Ahmaq Aurat aap itni bhi Ahmaq nhi ho..." He muttered with guilt and picked his mobile phone to listen to the call which was recorded in his mobile. A call which was erased from the call logs.

(Idiot woman, you're not really an Idiot.)

Hello, Deni... I have to tell you something. Her crying voice echoed in the silence of this room. Deni... Aap sun rahe hain?

(Deni, are you there?)

"Why with me?" He literally hit his head hard but couldn't find the courage to dial the number present on his mobile screen.

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