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In Khwabon ko bohot dhyan se dekha hai maine,

Tum tabeer banke na ate to main naraz ho jati...

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"Madiha." Athar whispered and she looked up while having a sip of tea and raised her brow. His hand slowly grabbed her hand which was resting on the table. She felt confused for a moment and put the cup of tea down.

"Aaj main tumhare sath kuch waqt guzarna chahta hu, tumse baate karna chahta hu." His hand grabbed her other hand too and she smiled a bit. "Hum abhi sath bethe baate hi kar rahe hain Athar, bina office ke kaam ki fikar kare ..." she added the last part as a joke but he didn't even smile. They were in a food court near the office to have lunch followed by Athar's mandatory Masala Chai.

(Today I want to spend some time with you, I want to talk to you. )

(Right now we are just sitting together and talking, Ather, without worrying about the office work.)

"Aese sab ke beech mein nhi..." looking here and there he left Madiha's hands and sat down while maintaining his posture so did Madiha. "Kahi akele, jaha tumhare aur mere siwa koi na ho..." Madiha looked up at him on his demand and again bowed her head. Her heart starting beating faster with fear. The same fear she was hiding inside her. The same fear that was stopping her to get married.

(Not publically like this... Somewhere alone, where there is no one except you and me...)

"Samajh rahi ho na main kya keh raha hu?" He whispered and softly put his hand on hers. Madiha felt nervous but she nodded without making eye contact with him.

(You know what I mean...)

She wasn't naive at all... She knew the difference between the gaze of a human and the gaze of a man. She started wearing a burqa to protect herself from the gaze of men only. But for the last few days she was noticing Athar's gaze... It was the gaze of a man. And they were in such a relationship that she could not hide herself from his affectionate gaze even if she desired.

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"Athar ye..." Madiha gulped when he stopped his bike in the parking area of a hotel. "Mene Ghar pe bol diya hai ki aaj kaam zyada hai to night shift bhi karni padegi... tum bhi Aamna se yahi keh do." She took a deep breath and saw Athar going towards the entry, he waited for her but when she didn't move so he came back and grabbed her hand.

(I have told you at home that there is a lot of work today so I will have to do a night shift too... you also tell the same to Aamna.)

"Tumhare sath kuch waqt guzarne ke liye hi ye intezam kra hai, ab kya tum sari raat yahi khadi rahogi?" Athar smiled and walked towards the entrance, Madiha was walking with him holding his hand tightly. Her palms were sweaty and the heartbeat was increasing rapidly.

(I have made this arrangement just to spend some time with you, now will you stay here the whole night?)

Soon they were in a cosy room, Athar looked at his wife who was looking nervous because of his sudden plan. "Be comfortable." he whispered and walked towards the switch board to plug in his charger and connect it to the mobile phone.

Madiha bit her lower lip and closed her eyes while letting out a sigh. Removing her Abaya she hung it properly and sat down on the edge of the bed. Athar smiled and sat down just beside his wife. Madiha's eyes were fixed on the floor. Athar slowly grabbed her hand which was resting on her thigh.

"Madiha." He slowly kissed the back of her palm and Madiha's eyes filled with tears, she clenched the corner of her shirt without lifting her eyes and bit her inner cheek hard. "Tum itni chup kyu ho?" Taking her hand in between his both hands he asked softly but Madiha pulled her hand from his grip and shifted away from him.

(Why are you so quiet?)

"kya hua?" Athar was surprised to see tears in her eyes.

(What happened?)

"Achha tum itni nervous to na ho, main to sirf tumhare sath kuch waqt..." grabbing her hand he shifted near her one more time but Madiha cried out while pulling her hand away from his grip.

(Okay, don't you be so nervous, I just want to spend some time with you.)

"Kya hua hai Madiha?"

(Tell me, What happened, Madiha?)

"Main pehle jitni khubsurat nhi hu, Athar." She cried out helplessly while hiding her face in both hands but Athar smile and pulled her hand away from her face. "Maine to tumhe kabhi dekha hi nhi tha, tumhare chehre se mohabbat nhi kri mene, tumse kri hai." She lifted her gaze to see the man who was showing his love in different ways, but she was unable to control her tears.

(I'm not as beautiful as I used to be, Athar.)

(I had never seen you, I did not love your face but you.)

"Main aapke layaq nhi hu."

(I don't deserve you.)

"Aur ye baat kisne kahi?" He asked with the same smile, Madiha kept looking in his eyes for a very long moment and pulled her right hand away from his grip. She pulled away her dupatta from her neck and slowly started opening the buttons of her shirt. He was surprised by her deed.

(And who said this?)

"Madiha, I just want to spend some time with you but if you're not comfortable then w..." before his sentence could be completed Madiha's eyes dropped a few more tears and she opened little portion of her shirt which was revealing the upper part of her right bosom. She was still not making eye contact with Athar and he was only seeing the black circular mark present on that milky white skin which was covered till a few seconds ago.

"Ye??" He asked and Madiha opened a little more to show the same black circles on her skin. She didn't have the courage to face him so she wasn't even lifting her gaze and crying with guilt, it wasn't difficult for Athar to understand the reason behind those marks.

"Cigarette burns?" He asked with another level of pain. Madiha nodded while trying to hide the marks but Athar held her hand.

"In 2-3 nishano ki wajah se tum kam khubsurat nhi ho gayi Madiha. Tum mere liye sabse zyada khubsurat ho." Madiha laughed like a sarcasm.

(Madiha, you have not become less beautiful because of these 2-3 marks. you are the most beautiful to me.)

She pulled her hands from his grip with embarrassment and wiped her tears to look at her husband. "2-3 nhi anginat nishaan hain, aur aesi jagaho par hain jo na main kisi ko bata sakti hu na dikha sakti hu..." Madiha again hid her face in her hands and cried out and this time she wasn't alone, Athar was crying with her. Shifting closer he embraced her protectivly. Those marks weren't only the testimony of burning of her skin but on her soul too. For next few minutes she was crying only on his cheat but suddenly realised that Athar wasn't comforting her anymore. Breaking the hug she saw him, he was looking shocked as well as pale. Madiha's heart started to sink, that's the reason she didn't want to get married, she knew no man would accept a wife with such scars.

(Not just 2-3, there are countless marks, and they are at such places which I can neither tell anyone nor show them...)

"Athar, main isi liye shadi nhi karna chahti thi, aapke layaq nhi hu."

(Athar, that's why I didn't want to get married. I am not worthy of you, I know.)

"Shut your mouth... just stop this rubbish." He literally scolded her while wrapping his arms around her tighter than before. "I don't care about anything, I don't care if you have these marks, I don't care if you can't become a mother, I don't care if you don't look as pretty as before, What I really care about is your presence in my life. I have accepted you with every wound, every scar because you have a beautiful heart and soul. No one can be as beautiful and modest as you are for me. You're the peace of my soul." Athar's words weren't only words but a remedy to her wounds. 

Madiha cried more as she compared her present life to the hell in which she was living till a few months ago. At one point she was done with his brutality and decided that she won't live a life like that anymore. If not she, then who would take action to protect her? She protested against Danish's violence and threatened him to go to the police. Madiha had a thought that Danish would think twice after listening about the involvement of police as it could harm his job and reputation in the long run but she was so wrong! That cruel man didn't get scared but he started this new kind of torture. In the place of one slap he used to place burning cigarette on her such part which she would never wanted to show anyone. Before doing this torture he used to make sure to tie Madiha's hands with her dupatta only, with her each scream he used to say... "Ab jaa police mein aur dikha kaha mara Maine... abhi ke abhi jaa, isi halat mein." (Now go to the police and show them where I hurt... go right now, in this condition only.) In the end Madiha stopped threatening him because tolerating slaps and kicks were a better option than this. She could tolerate the pain of slaps but these burns were intolerable, they hurt her not only at the time of violence but later on too. They hurt her in a way that she wasn't able to wear her undergarments for many days and each time when she cried while walking or working Danish used to mock to go to the police station for taking help and medicines. He knew how shy and modest Madiha was, she always felt shy in front of him even after a long period of marriage so how could she even tell anyone about these burns? Showing them to someone was impossible for her.

"Bohot roo chuki ho Madiha bas karo. Ab aur nahi." Kissing the middle of her head he break the hug and kissed her eyes one by one. Madiha was shocked... he didn't stop here. His lips slowly caressed her cheeks which gave her two feelings... first was an unknown pain and the other was pleasure... pure pleasure. In three years five months of her marriage with Danish she never knew that just a kiss could be so pleasing, it could be the impression of love. The purest form of love in a halal way. But this man was taking her to another world which was thousand times more beautiful than what she wished for while living with Danish.

(Madiha, you have cried a lot, please stop. not anymore.)

For the first time she was able to differentiate between love and so called love-making. This was love! Athar didn't do anything after kissing her cheeks, he just laid down on the bed waiting for Madiha to be comfortable in his presence but beyond his expectations she laid down beside him while placing her head on his arm only. Maybe it was the first time when she felt like hugging Athar and she actually didn't helt just hugged him and hid her face in his chest. "Sab kuchh kitna badal gya na." He whispered with closed eyes while his fingers were running in her hair.

(how much everything has changed)

"Bas aap kabhi nhi badaliyega." She felt peace in the rhythm of his heartbeat and Athar looked at his wife.

(yeah, but please, you don't change ever)

"Jesa madam ji ka hukam." Their eyes met, lips stretched in a smile And then they both did not know for how long they were talking to each without using a single word. In only a few days they have invented their own language of love which was full of sweet words and at the end of this conversation they both got their whole new world in each other. A world in which they discovered passionate love, pleasure and satisfaction altogether.

(Your order my command, Madam ji.)

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Starting at the white ceiling of the hotel room she was trying to cope with her uneven heartbeat. Turning her side she saw her husband sleeping peacefully. Cupping his face gently she caressed his well kept Heavy Stubble beard, she liked it but never told him.

"Athar..." she whispered while shaking his arm and he opened his eyes, nodded while sleeping and again dozed off. "Athar..."

"Hmm?" this time he opened his eyes a little and nodded but again closed his eyes. Madiha sighed. She never knew that waking up this man would be so difficult. Picking up the mobile phone from the pillow she glanced at the time which was already showing late morning.

"Athar mujhe ghar jana hai, uth jaiye na." after hearing the urgency in her voice he opened his eyes lazily.

(Athar, I've to go home, get up.)

"Itni bhi kya jaldi hai yaar?" he was still sleepy but Madiha gave him a disappointed look.

(Why are you in such a hurry, dude?)

"Athar, Mujhe Mohsin ko explain karna mushkil ho jayega ki ye kesi nightshift thi jo Sunday afternoon tak stretch ho gyi." she was looking nervous but he smiled and shifted a lock of her half wet hair away from her cheek.

(Athar, It would be difficult for me to explain to Mohsin what kind of night shift it was that stretched till Sunday afternoon.)

"Bachha nhi hai wo, ek bachhe ka baap hai. Kuchh nhi puchega tumse." Madiha's cheeks turned red due to shyness, she felt hesitate to think about Mohsin knowing the truth behind her nightshift which could also be defined as a shift with her husband.

(He is not a child, he is the father of a child. He Will not ask you anything.)

After seeing her blushing face Athar felt his heart at peace. "Pyaari lagti ho, hamesha hasti raha karo." And he drew out his arm to hug her but Madiha kind of rolled her eyes. "Main pagal hu kya jo bina wajah hasti raha karu?" Athar's hand which was going to grab her waist came back in a hurry and smacked his forehead.

(you look lovely, keep smiling.)

(Am I crazy to keep laughing without any reason?)

"Ufff... Badi unromantic biwi mili hai..." he grimaced so as Madiha "Aur aap over romantic hain."

(Ufff... I have got an unromantic wife.)

(and you're over romantic.)

"Abhi hum romantic huye hi kaha hai Madam ji..." pulling her in a hug he muttered but Madiha sprang out from his grip while giving him a disapproving look.

(Madam, I haven't become romantic yet.)

"Athar you're such a... " she huffed while stepping down from the bed. "I'm what?"

"Besharam... (shameless)" she looked away and Athar wanted to hit his head on the wall. If making love to his wife was besharmi (shamelessness) then he was happy to be a besharam (shameless).

Athar stood up while straightening his clothes but this time he was silent. Madiha combed her already wet hair, wore her abaya and made the bed. Athar smacked his forehead one more time. "Jhadu bhi laga do, aur dusting bhi kar dena!" Madiha gave him another disappointed look.

(Do dusting and mopping properly.)

"Room service walo ko unka kaam karne do na..." Athar told her with the same disappointment but she kept doing what she was already doing because she didn't want this bed to tell anyone the story of the last night.

(Let the room service people do their work...)

For the next few minutes they were getting ready without talking to each other but Somehow Madiha understood the meaning of his silence. He was standing in front of the mirror when she hugged him from behind. 

"Baat baat par naraz kyu hone lage hain aap, pehle to hamesha haste rehte the." she asked and Athar smiled with the thought that his wife actually cared about his feelings. 

(Why do you start getting angry at everything, earlier you were always smiling.)

"Naraz nhi hu..." he pulled her in front of himself and held her both hands. "Tumhara wedding gift abhi bhi ghar me rakha hua hai... Abhi tak tumhe kuch de hi nhi paya." He gave an apologetic look along with an explanation.

(I'm not offended.)

(Your wedding gift is still at home... I haven't been able to give you anything yet.)

"Mujhe kuch nhi chahiye, kuchh bhi nhi." She knew the pain of wearing handcuffs in the form of bangles. She remembered the taunt of good clothes as well as two meals a day, right now she didn't want anything other than what Athar was already providing to her. She held his hand and kissed the back of his palms. Her act wasn't only love but respect too.

(I don't want anything, nothing.)

Holding hand in hand they both walked out from the hotel room.

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"Want some pani puri?" Stopping the scooty near a road side vendor he asked and Madiha shook her head while jumping down from the scooty.

"Nope, not pani-puri but dahi bhalle." she smiled

"come." Holding her hand he moved towards the vendor, Madiha showed a big smile which was hidden in the niqab but she was not feeling suffocation anymore.

"Wese breakfast mein dahi bhalle kon khata hai?" He asked while starting the bike.

(By the way, who eats dahi bhalla for breakfast?)

"Lunch ka time ho gya hai janab, hum late uthe Hain iska ye matlab to nhi ki abhi breakfast ka hi time hai."

(Sir, it is time for lunch, just because we woke up late does not mean that it is time for breakfast.)

Athar bought a plate of chaat from a local Street side stall and passed it to his wife. For a moment Madiha stopped before having it... she remembered Danish taking her to the restaurant and telling her to eat while covering her face. But here Madiha lifted her niqab, Athar smiled and she picked the very first spoonful of it but stopped by a phone call.. "hold it please." Passing the plate to her husband she received the call.

"Hello."

"Kaha hain aap aapi?" Aamna asked

(Where are you Api?)

"Bas aa rhi hu!"

(I'm just coming!)

"Mohsin puchh raha hai wo pick krne aa jaye aapko office se?" Madiha's eyes become wide and she looked at her husband.

(Mohsin is asking if he should come to pick you up from office?)

"Nhi nhi, main bas aa hi rhi hu, A..Athar hain mere sath, wo hi drop kar denge."

("No no, I'm just coming, Athar is with me, he will drop me.)

"Ohhh... to kisi aur office me night shift thi kal? Okay... enjoy."

(ohhh... So the night shift was in another office. Okay. Enjoy.)

"Shut up Aamna, aa rhi hu abhi thodi deyr me." And she cut the call while giving a disappointed look to her husband. "Use pta chal gya."

Shut up Amna, I'll be back shortly.)

(she got to know)

"Chalo achhi baat hai, next time jhut bolne ki zarurat nhi padegi." Athar lifted a spoonful of chaat for her and she kind of glared at him. "Mujhe nhi pta tha aap itne besharam hain." madiha was surprised to see this side of her ideal man. Athar was also surprised to discover his new quality, he didn't know that doing something with his wife behind is closed doors was also a besharmi (Shamelessness), but now he was determined to become dheet (obdurate) too.

(Okay, it's a good thing, next time there will be no need to lie.)

(I never knew that you're such a shameless man.)

"Hmm... Ab biwi ban gyi ho to bohot kuch jaan'ne ko milega mere bare mein, abhi to jaldi se muh kholo." He lifted a spoonful of her favourite chaat "Kya ho gya hai Athar? Bazar me khade huye hain, ghar ke kisi kone mein nhi." Taking the spoon back from his hand she had it and both shared the same plate until the narrow road started to be blocked due to Athar's scooter which was parked in 'No parking space', He told Madiha to continue the chaat while he walked towards his two-wheeler to shift it somewhere else. 

(Hmm... now that you have become my wife, you will get to know a lot about me, now open your mouth quickly.)

(What are you doing Athar, we're standing in the middle of the market, not in a corner of the home.)

Madiha nodded and pushed one more bite in her mouth, if it was a date then she was enjoying it without thinking about the price of that mere item...

"Yu sadak par khade ho ke kyu khaa rhi ho? Chalo kahi le chalta hu tumhe, araam se baith ke jo khana hai khaa lo." Madiha's eyes lost their shine and her face turned dull after listening to that voice. She didn't want to see him but unwillingly she turned back to see a tall policeman standing right behind her, looking at her.

(Why are you eating while standing on the road? Let me take you somewhere, take a bath and eat whatever you want.)

"Aap... (you)" she felt scared and looked everywhere but Athar was nowhere.

"Main manta hu mujhe gussa zyada aata hai, ho gyi galtiyan... Maaf kar do, bohot mohabbat karta hu main tumse. Bhul jao sab kuch ghar chalo, tumhe koi takleef nhi dunga ab."

(I admit that I have anger issues, I know I have made mistakes In the past... Please forgive me, I love you very much. Forget everything and let's go home, I will not cause you any trouble.)

"Madiha, kya hua?" Athar came from the other side of the road when saw a man on the bike who was talking to his wife.

(What happened?)

"Athar." She whispered and he followed her gaze, it wasn't difficult to understand that this tall man was the same cruel creature. Danish forgot everything he was promised a little ago, his blood boiled to see Madiha with any other man.

"Main to hamesha se jaanta tha kitni badi badchalan aur awara hai tu..." Coming back to his real colors Danish said loudly to grab the attention of everyone. Madiha looked here and there. All the people on the road were seeing that characterless woman.

(I always knew that you're a characterless, low-grade woman.)

"Zaban sambhal ke baat kro, meri biwi hai ye." Athar came in front of his wife who was looking scared and pale. "Biwi? Dusri shadi karli tune... "

(Speak carefully, she is my wife.)

(wife? You got married for the second time..)

"Athar chaliye yaha se." Madiha pulled her husband and he glared at Danish. "Dur raho hamari zindagi se," Athar walked away with his wife and Danish kept watching him mounting on the bike, Madiha side straddled next to her husband while covering her face and soon they both disappeared from his sight.

(Athar, let's go from here.)

(stay away from our life.)

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